I am happy to report that I was successful is completing Capra’s 30/30 but let me tell you this past week of runs have not been easy…
2 days at work I had events at lunch that ultimately forced me to run in the evening which was tough given I was enjoying the breaking up of my day with fitness. But I’m happy to report I completed 30 days of running.
I then committed to another challenge..but unfortunately yesterday I didn’t run. I’m gearing up to move out this week and I’m finding this alongside work and everything else daunting…so my running slipped on Sunday and after 32 days of running I woke up ..and didn’t do that. I purged my make up , threw out a bunch of papers that need to be shredded and began wondering where this year has gone..since I still really can’t believe it’s December already.
Even today I didn’t pack my gym stuff, I took time with my make up and just thought about the week ahead and could feel the anxiety of it all crawling up my back and sitting on my shoulder.
But that’s the challenge isn’t it? Running ultimately let’s me clear my head but my anxiety likes to talk me out of it.
“you don’t have time”
“what’s the point? you don’t look any different anyway…”
“you won’t feel better afterwards..you’ll just feel sweaty and ugly”
I’ve written here about the Blerch and my blerch being my anxiety. I am determined to try and hit a km goal by the end of December and I’m confident with the focus of 30 minutes everyday..I can achieve that. I have to keep trying. It’s all we can do!
I’m also hoping to return to the squat rack..I miss lifting weights and I basically stopped after my PT sessions ended. I’m not in a position at the moment to purchase any more but I have the tools and tricks ingrained in me..i just need to reaffirm the discipline of going.
Fitness is a journey and there are days where I truly feel like it’s a part of my identity…and others where my anxiety tells me I’m a fraud and I will forever be that girl in high school gym who could barely run laps around the track.
Most of all however…I’m excited to share that I’m moving in with Mr Tall. Mr Tall and I run together when we can and we both are anxious to start being a super fit couple (ie gym together and run together when schedules allow) He as also assured me that he will take on the task of meal prepping as I cannot cook to save my life (My cooking is limited to breakfast, smoothies, salads, and sammiches..and for now I’m okay with that)
I think being fit with the person you date is important. It’s a hobby you can do together and it’s a great way to push each other too! It’s not for everyone but running with Jeremy (Mr Tall) has been a great discovery together over these past 3 years.